Giving Thanks for Many Blessings

I originally wrote this in 1997, and it was published by The State newspaper on September 12, 1997.  I was thinking of my new blessings since then and thought I would give this an update.

This is a thank you letter to all of the special people in my life - past and present - who have played a part in making me the person I am today.

You see, I was born two months premature with a congenital birth defect that affecteldd;lf;lfsdl;dd both my hands and feet.  The many doctors I have seen over the years went back and  forth with names for it, and it was not until I became an adult that doctors settled on distal arthrogryposis.  I spent lots of time in hospitaThamls with doctors poking and prodding me.  Now I am 37 years old, a mother and wife, and a full time special education teacher.

My first thank you is to my parents and my brothers.  I need to thank them for everything they have done for me - big and small - but especially for giving em the gift of a normal childhood.

I want to thank my parents for the nights spent at the hospital,countless doctors appointments, for calling me "Nena", and singing me songs about my life.

Thank you to my parents for being proud of my accomplishments, for guiding me through my failures, for wiping away my tears, for sharing my laughter, and for loving me.  Thank you for making me who I am - your daughter who loves you very much.

Thank you to my brothers for letting me tag along with you and your friends and not complaining (at least not too much).  Thank you for fighting with me  and playing with me  and bringing me pizza when I refused to eat hospital food.  Thank you also to my sister-in-law, nephews, and nieces for their love, smiles, and hugs.

Thank you to my husband for his unconditional love and unfailing support.  You have been my my best friend as well as the love of my life.  Thank you for being a wonderful husband and amazing father to our three kids.  Thank you for the memories we have made and for the many more we will make with our wonderful family.

Thank you to my children.  You teach me something new everyday.  Your grace, strength, and intelligence amaze me.  I look forward to being your mom in the years to come and to be there for all of the laughter and tears we will share.

I would next like to thank my numerous doctors.  My dad was in the Army so I spent lots of time in military hospitals and had a plethora of doctors.  I was lucky to have always had such wonderful caring doctors who took the time to talk to me and to give me those nasty sugar free suckers.  Thank you to my doctors who through the surgeries and leg braces did their best to walk better and use my hands in a more useful way.

Thank you for treating me as a person and not as a patient.

I have a very special thank you for a doctor in Fort Gordon, Georgia - Dr. Baja.  He was my doctor for many years.  He called me "princess" and made me look forward to going to the hospital.  I know when I went I would see his smile and hear him ask, "How is my little princess today?"  Thank you for caring for my life outside of the hospital.

Thank you to the therapists and doctors that have treated my daughter who also have distal arthrogryposis.  They have helped my girls grow to be confident in themselves and with their knowledge have lessened the need for them to have had as many surgeries as I did.

Thank you to all of my teachers at Conder, Dent, and Richland Northeast.  Thank you for giving me one of the most precious gives of all - an education.  Also, thank you for giving me the desire to bestow this same gift on others by becoming a teacher.  I was very lucky to have had such wonderful teachers.

Thank you to all my friends from childhood to adulthood.  Thank you for the fun and special memories we have created.  Thank you for consoling me when I felt inconsolable and for laughing with me until we could laugh no more.

Thank you to the Lord, our God, for giving me my family and friends, and for giving me the strength that has enabled me to have the wonderful life I have had.

I remember growing up, wishing not to have been born with distal arthrogryposis.  I used to think how much easier life would have been.  But now I know that I would not be the same strong, intelligent, confident person I am today.

My List: What I Look Forward to in the Fall

In the car today one of my girls asked me what I was looking forward to about the fall and we started coming up with a lis of 10 things we like about fallt:

1.  Cooler temperatures
2.  College football
3.  Have a routine again when school starts
4.  Being able to play / be outside without wearing mosquito repellent
5. The leaves changing colors
6.  Feeling like life is settling down some
7.Pumpkin patches
8.  The crackle of leafs on the side walk
9.  The State Fair
10. Halloween

Fall has always been my favorite season.  I can't wait for it to come soon.

What is your favorite season?

Things This Mom Does Not Do

I came across this blog the other day from The Happiest Mom and on it the writer listed 5 things she does not do as a mom and 5 things she wishes she did do as a mom.  

I thought I would try my own list.

Things This Mom Does Not Do

Purposefully Lose at Games.  I am too competitive to lose at games when I play with my children.  If they win, it is an honest win, and if they lose well then they have to deal with it...

Watch Cartoons.  Many of the cartoons now a days really grate on my nerves.  It is rare I will sit down and watch a cartoon with my kids and not have something else to do (read a book, grade papers, etc.).  Now I do enjoy watching many of kid movies with them, but when it come to the 30 minutes shows on Disney, Nick Jr., or Sprout...I could do without.

Iron.  I think one of the best products out there is Downy Wrinkle Release spray.  It has saved me many mornings from having to iron clothes.  I will iron on rare occasions, but for the most part I just leave it to my husband to take care of.

Things this Mom Does Not Do  BUT Wants To

Do More Craft Activities.  I would love to do more craft activities with my kids.  I find that sometimes my patience and / or energy level is zapped by the time I get home or the weekend comes to do these type of activities.  I know my kids would love it and I hope I can make this a reality soon.

Finish / Start My Children's Scrapbooks.  I am so far behind and there are times I want to give up.  Katie's is 3/4 of the way done and Jake only has photos organized into a folder for when I do start his.    I hope to make his a bound book instead of a scrap book.

Take More Home Movies of the Kids.  We took a ton of footage when Maddie was little and then there has been a sharp decline of the video footage taken with each child.  I was reminded tonight when I took snippets of Jake's dancing of how much I may be missing...

What are your mom don'ts?

Reality TV

Okay...I will 'fess up.

I enjoy reality tv.

Now I use the term reality loosely, but I take guilty pleasure in watching other people's train wrecks.

My first taste came with MTV's The Real World. It was the season in San Francisco. I so enjoyed watching their "drama."

Today I now like watching most of the competition shows - especially cooking ones. I also enjoyed pretty much anything on Bravo TV.

Right now I am watching Big Brother, Real Housewives of NY and New Jersey, the Next Food Network Star, Design Star, and Master Chef.

What don't I watch? I have never been able to get into the Bachelor / Bachelorette. I also no longer watch MTV series like Teen Mom or Real World.

What guilty TV pleasure do you have?

What??? It is July 8th Already???

Where has the summer gone?
It feels just like yesterday I was counting the days for summer to come.
I am definitely NOT ready for it to end, so I am NOT counting down for when I have to report back to school.  Surprisingly though, my girls have said they are ready for school.  I think they miss their friends.  While I love our neighborhood and house, the one drawback is there are not enough kids nearby for them to play with.  All of our immediate neighbors are either retired or nearing retirement.

Where has our summer gone?  
The Tour of Florida (Gainesville, Tampa, and Disney)
Vacation Bible School
Acting Camp
Golf Lessons
Our 9 year anniversary
Trips to the movies
Lots of Swimming
Lots of books read and drawings made

Where is our summer going?
Washington D.C. / Virginia
More golf lessons and acting camp
More swimming
Hopefully a trip to the beach
Trip to Atlanta
Jake's first birthday
More books to read and more drawings to make

I Am a Mother

It has been a long tome since I have posted.  I have had lots of ideas floating around in my head but have not made the time to sit down and write them down.

I Am a Mother...

I am the mother of five (I include my dogs in that count).

I am a mother who is fiercely protective of her children and struggles with making sure I am not over protective.

I am a mother who loves to celebrate their birthdays.

I am mother who has trouble finding the balance between my family, my work, and myself.

I am a mother who needs a little mothering herself.

 I am a mother who is divided...I want my kids to stay little, but I love seeing them grow up and assert their independence.

I am a mother who...

loves my blue jeans and wishes I could wear them to work.

wants to find more time to pursue my personal interests.

who loves to cook, but hates housework.

who has big ideas for my house.

who is married to my best friend.

who KNOWS she needs to have more patience.

and who LOVES her life.

Yesterday, Today, and Tomorrow

Yesterday...
When I think back on the past I can say without a doubt I had a happy childhood.  Growing up I had a loving family, of course there were dysfunctions, but what family doesn't have those.  I know I was loved and I know I was happy and the way I was raised made me the person I am today.  No regrets or what ifs hang over my head.

Today...
Today my life continues to be happy...oh sure I have my wants, but I have no needs.  Today I want my children to go to bed happy and know they are loved.  I want my husband to know I will be there when he goes to sleep and when he wakes up and plan on being there for at least the next 50 years.

Tomorrow...
Tomorrow I look forward to my children grow into confident and caring individuals who will be able to think for themselves.  I want to help raise a generation both in my home and in my classroom of people who care for those around them.

8 Weeks and Counting

Spring Break is over...

8 weeks left of for school.

Will I make it?  About this time every year I ask myself the same question and every year I make it with my sanity still in tact.

I cannot wait for summer this year.  Last summer was rough because I was in my last trimester of my pregnancy and did not want to do anything.  It was too hot to move and every time I moved too much I began having contractions.  I felt bad for my girls because they did not get to do a lot of fun stuff.

My plan for this summer is to be a summer of fun.  Lots of time swimming, trips big and small, and good memories (I hope) for all of us.

Now to get through these 8 weeks...

What Makes Me Happy

When I was in college I kept a happiness journal.  I still have that journal and here is a list of a few of the things that made me happy back then:

fresh cut flowers

washing th car while barefoot

Cool Water cologne

french fries with ranch dressing

Monster Margaritas

Denny's

My badge

sleeping in

beer and Oreos

hammocks

Basset Hounds

roaming the halls

sunrises and sunsets

water fights

drinking beer and shooting pool

formal dresses

window seats

Now some of the things that make me happy:

my husband

my beautiful children

my dogs

supper club

a glass of wine

a quiet house

a noisy house

planning birthday parties

my dogs

having a screened in porch with a fan

seeing my students graduate

my mom's Rice Krispy Treats

sunsets

wrap around porches

window seats

my children's laughter

having a tidy house and all of the laundry done

My list could go on and on...maybe I should start recording this in a journal again.

What makes you happy?

My Life as a Student

OK...I am home today with a sick child and decided to catch up on my blog.

Today's topic comes from the Fall 2010 Blog Challenge.

My life as a student was a good one.  I loved school and never went through an extended period of time when I did not want to go.  School came pretty easy for me.  My love in school came in reading and social studies.  I loved learning how to read and write when I was young and then as I got older I thoroughly enjoyed history classes (even those AP History classes - for any high school friends out there reading this you know what I am talking about!).  Math and science were a different story.  I struggled through all of the algebra and science classes - getting a B in those classes was a lot of work.

Socially I had my few good friends that stayed with me through middle and high school.  I always easily found my place in school and felt quite content with my life.

I think the most defining moment in my life as a student came the summer between my junior and senior years of high school.  I had what I consider my first true boyfriend and my two best friends and I spent the summer at the SC Governor's School for the Arts.  To be honest I was quite surprised I got in.  I went for creative writing and while I enjoyed writing I was never was into the creative aspect of it...at least not as much as the other people who were in my program.  I definitely was not the brooding author the rest of my group was and always ended up hanging out with the actors in the drama program.  That program actually made me finally decide that becoming a teacher was the career I wanted and not a journalist.

That summer was my transition from being a teenager to becoming a young adult.  I had my first major heartbreak that summer and knew I was ready for college.  I think that summer made me more independent.  I was ready to be on my own.

Now my life as a student is more through the professional development I go through as a teacher - the classes I take and the books I read.

So I think I wandered off topic a bit.  What do you remember about your life as a student?

What Part of Motherhood Surprises Me?

Wow!  Before becoming a mom I thought how hard could it be to do it all.  Really all you needed was lots of love right?

Growing up I loved being around kids and loved the idea of being a mom.  My niece and nephews were awesome and I loved babysitting for other people's children.  I had ideas of all of the millions of books I would read with my own children and all of the fun games we would play.

Now I am a mother of three and here is a list of things that surprise me.

• the never ending to-do list...there is always something I could be doing at home, for the kids, or with the kids
• the amount of mental and physical energy it takes to raise three kids
• the endless amount of laundry and dishes that need to be washed and put away
• the constant range of emotions that can be felt in one day : happiness - love - frustration - impatience - sadness - surprise - fear - anticipation - optimism 
• the endless moments of awe
• the feeling of never being truly alone - there is always someone there (even if it just the dogs)
• the constant need to make decisions, re-evaluate my decisions, and make new decisions
• the lack of sleep ~ no one can truly describe what lack of sleep is like; I never knew how much I would miss sleeping in
• the incredible bond I have with my children ~ now I understand how my mom knew me as well as she did; I think I know some of my kids moves before they know them
• there are no sick days when you are a mom
• how wonderful it is to hear "You are the best mommy in the whole world"
• now I know what unconditional love is

What has surprised you about being a mom?

My Dog Years

Recently my language arts class read the autobiography by Gary Paulsen, My Life in Dog Years, and I thought that would be a good topic for a blog.

For anyone who knows me well knows I have always had a dog in my life.  

BUSTER

This first dog in my life was Buster.  He was an outside dog who was a very good guard dog.  I remember Buster as being a ham for anyone taking pictures.  Whenever I look back at photos of him he always seemed to have some sort of pose going on.  For me I would not call him a companion dog because he was really my older brother's dog.  Buster died when I was 10 of old age.  I remember that day clearly because that was the first experience I ever had with death.

SQUIRCK

Squirck was the second dog in my life.  He was mine.  I got Squirck in kindergarten.  He was a chihuahua mix and I think I intended to name him Squirt, but when asked how to spell it I spelled Squirck.    He always slept in my room.  He was always the last one to sleep at night and would come and settle in my room after everyone else was settled in bed.  He was also the first up in the morning for his early morning patrol of the house to make sure everything was in order.  Squirck was my constant companion growing up.  He listened to me like no one else did and shared all of my joys and heartaches.  Squirck passed away the fall of my sophmore year in college and I still remember that day clearly.  It happened quietly in his bed at my parents' home.  My brother drove up to Winthrop from Columbia to tell me.  I happened to be in the lobby of my residence hall when he came in the door.  The moment I saw him I knew Squirck passed.   I will always miss my best friend.

UBU
When I was in fifth grade my older brother got a new dog to replace Buster.  He named him Ubu.  He got the name Ubu from the tv production company that had several tv shows on in the 80's. Do you remember the phrase, "Sit Ubu Sit...Good Boy"?  Ubu was a mix of golden retriever and german shepherd.  He was a very strong dog who loved to jump on people.  He also liked to drag my Barbies around the back yard by the hair.  One of my most favorite memories of him was sitting in the laundry room in the evening while he was in his bed and rubbing his ears and talking with him.  The end of his life was a hard one to watch because he became blind and then began to loose the use of his legs.  The night I said goodbye to him was fall of 1999.  I was twenty-five and I sat next to his box and rubbed his ears and had a talk with him.  The thought of it now still brings tears to my eyes.  About a week later my brother took him to the vet and said his own goodbyes to Ubu.

SCOUT
July of 1999 I got Scout.  I picked him up from a local no kill shelter.  He is a Walker Coon Hound / Beagle mix - white with tan spots and tan ears.  Scout has a very special place in my heart and that of my husband's.  He became our first dog.  Now this our thing we did not know about when I first picked Scout out because I had not yet met Mike.  I met Mike the following week.  But now 11 1/2 years later, Scout is our dog ~ our first child.  Scout is a well traveled dog.  While Mike  lived in Florida, Scout made the trek up and down I-95 with me, and then up and down I-77 when Mike moved to Charlotte.  He always traveled well in the car and like to sit up front.  He never jumped around or barked or went nuts in the car.  He is always relaxed and just enjoyed the ride by looking out of the window.  People often comment to me that from a distance he looked like a person from behind.    For many years Scout went to my parents for doggie day care.  Everyday I would drop Scout off before work and pick him up after.

Scout is a great dog and loves people.  I think he likes people more than other animals.  His favorite activity is to lounge around on the couch looking out the window / sleeping.  Last winter we had a scare and thought for a weekend that we would have to put Scout to sleep.  Fortunately it turned out to be fixable because I do not think Mike or I were ready to say good-bye (not that one is ever ready).  I hope for a few more quality years with him.

SNAPPY

In 2007 Mike and I decided on another dog.    We went back to the no kill shelter I got Scout from and came home with Snappy.  My daughter Maddie named him.  He is also a hound mix and is a very sweet dog.  However, Snappy is full of energy that at times can be exasperating.  He is also very loyal and is always under my feet.  Snappy does not like to be far from me when we are in the house.  If we would let him, Snappy would become a 70 pound lap dog.

My Life as a Reader

I stole this topic from a blogger who swiped it from another blogger.  The original blog it first appeared on was the blog Once Upon a Teacher the Fall Blog Challenge 2010.  There are many great topics that I think I will use to help jump start my writing.

My Life as a Reader

I love to read!   My earliest memories involve books.   One of the first Christmas gifts I remember is a stack of Little Golden Books.  I remember being read to nightly, going to the library on Trenholm Road and on Fort Jackson and visiting the bookmobile.

As a child some of my most favorite books were: Lyle Lyle the Crocodile, The Hungry Caterpillar, Babar, Bread and Jam for Frances, and Ferdinand the Bull.  As I grew older I began enjoying the authors Beverly Cleary, Judy Blume, and Donald Sobol.  Once I hit middle school I started to read more of the tween romance books such as the Sweet Valley High series and books by the author Paula Danziger and V.C. Andrews.  High school came along and more of my reading focused on what I had to read for English class.  There were a few books I enjoyed while in high school such as A Tale of Two Cities, Catcher in the Rye, The Great Gatsby, and Lord of the Flies.  High school was when I feel in love with a particular genre of books Southern Fiction.  Some of my all time favorite southern authors are Harper Lee, Carson McCullers, Dori Sanders, and Pat Conroy. I still enjoy reading (or re-reading these novels).  As an adult some of the authors I find myself gravitating to are Ann Rivers Siddon, Dorothea Benton Frank, Jonathan Kellerman, James Patternson, and John Grisham.  I also like searching off of the bestseller list and reading biographies and true crime novels.

Growing up I read everywhere and always put myself to bed with a good book.  As long as I was comfortable I could lose myself for hours in a book.  Now it is not as easy to read.  I have to carve out time for reading.  Much of my reading is for my job.  Some of the books I read are for professional development and others are finding books that my students will enjoy.  Recently I received a Kindle and I am finding myself having a little more time to read for pleasure.   I am also reading a lot for my own children.  I am enjoying passing onto my kids different books that I enjoyed reading as a child and discovering new authors such as Jane Yolen, David Shannon, Julia DeVillers, and Alyssa Crowne.

What is your life as a readier like?

Happy New Year and Those New Year Resolutions

I have one major New Year's resolution.

To rediscover myself..

My plan is to do the following.

• To write more and I figure since I am in front of the computer more and more that this would actually be easier than the traditional journal.  I used to love to write when I was in high school and college.  When I had more time to be reflective.  My writing was always about life and my observations of it either through poetry or prose.  I have missed writing and am going to try to my hand at it again.
• To keep a gratitude journal.  I plan to write down at least one thing that I am grateful for each day.  Now this should go without saying I am extremely grateful for my family, friends, career, and life.  I want to find those everyday things that make me smile and say thanks.
• To carve out time for me in my busy life.  I think this will be the hardest to do with having a husband, 3 kids, and 2 dogs to care for as well as working full time, but I have to do it.

So join me on my journey of rediscovery and let's see where we end up.